Even though it was cruel and unfair and way too early for his life to end, it still had to happen.
I added the collage to show some of his many faces and with one of his favorite toys, his shark, which he tore apart pretty well.
He has been with me for 4 years and man we have been through a lot together. I will always remember how excited he was to see me after I got back from Colorado, which was about 4 months of us being apart. I knew then that he would never be anyone else's dog but my own. The love I have for him is immense and I'm not sure anyone could really understand. He has been with me through thick and thin and I feel like a failed parent by not being able to be there with him at the end....
It would not have been fair to him to go through with any surgery or to keep him alive because he would never be the same-he would not be able to run like he loves to, or chase things or jump up into my arms, or just be the loving puppy I will always know him to be.
My great comfort at this time is knowing that he was with people that loved and cared for him this past month and some days. I know he was an extremely happy puppy throughout his life up until his last day.
This pain is greater than anything I have dealt with, and I'm not quite sure how I'm going to move past it.....
I thank my family and friends for being there for me as much as they could with this distance (since I am in England at the moment while this all happened back in Minnesota). And I know I put them through a lot by not being able to accept this ending right away, but knowing I had such caring people around me during this time has meant a lot to me and it helped me to accept the truthfulness of the situation.
Now to lay down on my bed in my little attic and think about how I will take my next steps over these next few days......
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